Saturday, 2 January 2010

When i got to the third year of hi school i had my one and only "fight" a so called friend decided i needed Toughening up and decided to punch me in the face on the was home, I just stood and cryed ... well girls do ... a friend will call him Tim asked what was wrong after telling him he ran up to the agresser and punched him squire on the chin this helped me but not for long the following few days were hell. All i had was threats and such like untill one day in a wood work class after so many " im going to get you after school " and such i fliped i grabed him by the neck and pushed his head down the back of one of the old school radiators " I told him to just leave me alone "
He tryed to get up a few times and by the time i did let him up he had some really nice red markes were the radiator was next to him he walked away and at the end of the lesson came eup to me saying " I really dont know why you pretend to be so soft you could beat any one in this school and be the cock of the school" to which i replyed "That is the whole point i dont wont to i just wont to get through this horrid time of my life and get out the other end un hurt " i had no other problems with him again in fack t we became good friends again .

It was this year i found out what a Transexuall is and that in fact i was one of this small band of special people the B.B.C Did a documentry on this subject a guy called George who they filmed on his jurney to becoming Julia Grant i watched this program every week as soon as i sarted watching it i knew just what i had been suffering from and Oh my did it panic me " I will have to go through all this crap this poor woman is going through "

One episode i remember vividly was one were george went into a dress shop and was looking round when the assistant asked if she could help him " yes i would like to try this dress on please " then went on to explain why he wonted to try it on the shop owner was so helpfull giving help and advice .

I was doing Social Studys in school and the topic of conversation was all about this program the girls in the class were so in ore of George for asking for a dress they seamed to be saying they would love to know someone like this and there i was sat there thinking should i tell them i felt the same as George ,,,,,,, NO WAY i think i would have just had the pee taken out of me i knew them too well.

One othr episode that reall shook me up was one were Julia had to visit her Phyciatrist
when Julia turned up at the appointment in Trousers of all things well he hit the roof as i think he thought all women and trans women even more so should wear dresses or skirts all the time
wow was this bloke a total asre i just thought i hope i never meet any one like him if i go through all this to be myself .

Julia then paid for Breat Augmentation to which her Phyciatrist told her he would no longer treat her as she dare to go over his head and have work done that he didnt agree with .
i felt this program was my life in years to come .


  1. I remember that documentary. The psycolgist was a real old fuddy duddy. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth.
    I didnt warm to him at all.

  2. Lisa said I should come over and have a look while we were chatting so here I am. That must have been a devastating moment when they stopped everything at the last moment, I just can't imagine what it must have felt like and how much preparation had to be abandoned. You are here so you must have survived somehow. I have clicked to follow you and soon you will find that you are far from alone if you start to look about. look forward to your next posts and hope you get something from ours.

    Caroline XX

  3. I wish I had had so few punch-ups when I was at school. My teenage years were "difficult", I was constantly at war with someone or other.

    That documentary would have been aired when I was still at primary school so maybe just before my time. I have a feeling the first time I learned that someone could be a transsexual was when I saw an interview with Jan Morris who as James Morris covered the Everest climb in 1952 as a journalist. Must have been 1982 I guess. And yes, like you it was a landmark moment for me.

  4. Wow, I had completely forgotten about that documentary. I am trying to remember how old I was (which I guess means it was before I was 10)...

    I was more the punch bag at School than anything else. I did flip a couple of times which helped, but generally got a beating for it afterwards.