Thursday 31 December 2009

The Early Years

I started my long journey when i was about 5 years old i had a very strong desire to Dress in girls clothes, To this day i dont know why i was just glad my mum worked for a clothing company who did house partys ( bit like ann summers but not as sexy) I think i first remember dressing up at a nursary school i went to were they had a dressing up box. I managed to be the princess from time to time , Then i carried it on at home, When we moved to Holmfirth in West Yorkshire were i still live today .

My First memories are of wearing Peticoats under my Pajamas when i was in bed the top covering what i was wearing, Some of you may be wondering why does a young boy wear Girls clothes well let me tell you "I THINK JUST THE SAME" I never thought one day ooo i must wear a dress.

I just knew I had to wear these clothes and how good i felt when i was dressed it never had any sexuall nature to this dressing well at this age it wouldent but it never did even in adult life .

I carryed on dressing while i grew up in secret and then i bought my first skirt when i got to the age of about 9 what a troumatic thing this was for a 9 year old. It was in Hudderfield in C & A i had found my size from a catalog so i knew what size i needed a 10 was my target so i walked round the store untill i found one i liked the look of , It must have been about my 15th or so pass of the Skirt when i picked it off the rail and foling it to hide what it was i went and paid the massive sum of £6 for it and then with head down i walked out of the shop , Wow i had done it but the feeling of disgust with myself was to last many years .

I went stright to my room when i got home with some excuse i wonted to watch telly i was able to wear MY skirt for about an hour untill tea was ready but with my toy chest behind the door i still didnt feel safe was i going to be found out .

When i started school i found Girls wow they were a differnt speices and they were allowed to wear Skirts so why wasnt I allowed to i couldnt see any differance between us .

Tuesday 22 December 2009

depressed

Hi Im depressed cos i went for my GRS op which would have been the end of a very long road of transition but it was cancled due to me having a UTI I will have to wait weeks now